Manford of the Moment

AMBITIOUS: Colin Manford looking for success

THE clean cut style, cheesy grin and quick wit of Manchester’s most exciting comedy export, Jason Manford, are qualities that you might also expect to find in his tight knit family. For the most part you’d be right but Colin Manford’s straggly beard, glasses and lesser bank balance set him far apart from his nationally acclaimed brother and as he sits across from me in a busy city pub, most punters are unaware of his comic talents.

But despite appearances, the star’s younger brother is also taking to the stage after a somewhat chequered few years in and out of colleges and odd jobs. After leaving school, the six foot plus, larger than life youngster hadn’t a clue of what his future might hold and stand up comedy wasn’t even on his radar, in spite of his instinctively witty personality.

Colin’s ability to make light of things was a necessity when growing up however, as the Manford family struggled in the working class Whalley Range suburb of Manchester during his early life, yet for years he has shied away from the spotlight. “We grew up with pretty much nothing, so you have to entertain yourself and come up with your own stuff. As far as family goes, it’s full of entertainers especially on my mum’s side, even my other older brother who is a plumber is also a part time magician,” he explains.

In fact after re-taking some school exams the self confessed class clown ended up on a mundane communications course at a local college which he seemed destined to fail from the start. “It was just dire, I only lasted 6 months. My decision to leave was based on a Tuesday because I used to get home when it was dark and I just didn’t like that,” he says with a rye smile.

And this became a recurring theme as the unmotivated joker unsuccessfully went through several colleges before taking an unexpected two year detour. As Jason broke into mainstream TV, Colin was asking if you wanted your sandwich toasted at your local Subway as he continued to search for his calling. “These last few years have been mental, I often sit back and think what am I doing, why did I work in subway for two years.

“At the time it was only supposed to be a stop gap but I just got comfortable. Living at home with no bills to pay, getting £300 every two weeks with a Wetherspoons down the road, I was like a full on alcoholic for two years,” he recalls.

But after eventually pulling himself away from the beer and butties he did some teacher training and eventually followed in his brother's footsteps by working his way on to a media and performance course at the University of Salford, where he finally started to ask questions about comedy. In fact after years ignoring his ability to make people laugh, he finally took the leap of faith into stand up comedy in 2007 but it wasn’t all going to be ovations and encores straight away.

WINNER: Colin Beats the Frog

The bumbling funny man pretty much fell in at the deep end by entering ‘King Gong’ at the Comedy Store in Manchester, where comedians get a tiny five minute berth on stage to avoid getting gonged off by a rowdy crowd.

“I thought about it just before uni and then I finally caved in to one of my mates. Doing King Gong at the Comedy Store was honest to god the worst day of my life,” he explains. “Beat the Frog is friendly, it’s a nice one, even if you get gonged off. But King Gong is brutal, it’s hostile, the compere encourages the crowd to heckle but I got the two mixed up and signed up for King Gong. I lasted two minutes.”

A shattered Manford was drowning his sorrows in the club’s foyer when veteran comedian Mick Ferry offered the young amateur a pep talk and within days Colin was back on stage at Beat the Frog, which he duly won at the first attempt. He says: “Mick basically told me to keep writing as not every audience is going to like every joke you write, it’s not all about acting like a mentalist like they do at King Gong and he was right.”

Colin’s baptism of fire into the world of stand up was a real wake up call to him of his brother’s achievements and now he hopes to emulate Jason’s achievements having seen the blueprint. “Straight off I’d say my brother is someone I look up to. I mean because we’re so close and because he’s grafted so hard, now I know what can happen if I graft hard. He’s done his education, finished uni and he’s doing brilliantly,” he says proudly.

But as a result of his brothers huge success, Colin was so wary of becoming pigeon-holed as some sort of tribute act that for his first two years as a stand up he all but dismissed his identity, working under the pseudonym of Colin Charles. He explains: “It’s difficult for me because I’m immediately cast as Jason’s brother, I mean I don’t use Jason’s jokes and I don’t talk about him so why should I be presented to people using his name?”

Following a two year crash course in comedy under his new name, during which he built up an admirable reputation, Manford finally unveiled his identity at the comedy Mecca of the Edinburgh Festival last year.

“I’m proud of what I achieved as Colin Charles. It’s just because I didn’t want to be labelled back then and I got fed up eventually. It’s my name too, it’s for my parents, wanting them to feel like there’s another Manford out there making it but I’ve got a long way to go,” he continues. “Now I use my name as a plus point because if people say you’re just Jason’s brother then I get on stage and prove to them that I’ll be funny off my own back.”

And it has to be said that Colin is definitely his own man when it comes to his comedy. Jeff Davis, a local student living in Salford, saw both Jason and his young apprentice at the same Beat the Frog contest last year. He says: “Colin was great on the night and he got a really good reception. His jokes were a lot darker than Jason’s though, they’re both great story tellers but Colin swears a bit more and talks more about student life. He did remind me a lot of his brother though, just because of his mannerisms really but that’s always going to happen with brothers.

“I wouldn’t be surprised if I saw Colin on TV in a year or two, he’s definitely one of the better comics I’ve seen but it often takes years before you see a club comic on mainstream shows. I think he has a great future in stand up from what I’ve seen.”

Now in his third year as an aspiring comic, Manford is gigging at least three times a week in and around Manchester and the North West with the ultimate aim of reaching the big time. As he sits back, takes a gulp of water and explains his grand aims, it’s clear that he’s ambitious. But the burden of his brother’s success has meant that some promoters have tried to market him by using Jason’s name, something which Colin despises, but you can’t help but wonder when that might end. “He’s not going to be here and our materials is not the same so that does annoy me, some people take the piss like that,” he says.

In fact Colin is setting his sights on conquering more than just the stand up genre with other projects that include directing and starring in his own independent film, starting a production company and trying to get acting work. Comedy is clearly his greatest passion however, as you can’t help but share his enthusiasm when he talks you through his favourite stand up moments. He clears his throat and gestures a 3D image of his favourite gig and you feel compelled to be taken on his comic journey.

“There must have been 350 people crammed into the Frog and Bucket and I was warming the crowd up for the competition, it just felt like it was the best gig of my life,” he excitedly recalls. “I don’t usually get hecklers either but this time I did because is slagged Salford off and there was this crazy, fat woman from Salford on the balcony and she started threatening me. She even gave me the gun signs and then she flashed me, the biggest black bra I’ve seen in my life. I managed to get a standing ovation after that, I had a really good gig.

SHOWMAN: Colin on stage

“I think the best thing that came out of that was when her husband came up to the stage and asked the compere why they were thrown out, so the compere said: ‘Well your wife just threatened to kill a comedian, so I think that’s grounds to be kicked out of a comedy club, don’t you?’,” he laughs.

But unfortunately the life of a young journeyman stand up is not all that glamorous and more often than not Colin finds himself working for free at charity events and club nights that could not be further away from the limelight. Yet as much as he’s not the biggest fan of the old working men’s club, it certainly beats subway.

“I’m one of those people who cant say no to anyone so I’ll end up doing charity events for people and more often than not they’re just shambolic. I did one last week for Age Concern in Heaton Norris and it was just brutal,” he continues. “I mean before hand I came up with all these new jokes and ideas to try and when I got there the crowd was literally age concern.”

The upbeat comic is happy at the moment just to get out there and gain experience, with a more than supportive family firmly behind him and expert advice from his celebrated sibling. In fact Colin is keen to learn as much as he can from someone who has been there and done it, and there’s sure to be a lot of laughs along the way. “He’s dead interested as well in what I’m doing, we have a lot of banter and he’s always putting me down in front of people in a friendly way, with the whole ‘he’s trying to be a comedian’ joke,” Colin smirks.

As he slurps the final dregs of his water, it’s clear Colin has found his passion and with a brother of whom he is proud and who gives him constant support besides the banter, you can’t help but back him to go all the way. But there is still something missing for Colin as despite the fact that Jason has appeared on the same bill as him, he’s never actually seen Colin’s stand up. “Performing in front of Jason is one thing I’d love to happen because I’ve performed in front of my mum, dad and my other brothers and even a girl who I used to be in love with, which was petrifying. I know he’ll give me good advice,” he says.

So even when the teasing and jokes are flying, Colin rests in the knowledge that although his brother is nationally known, the mutual respect that they have for each other remains unblemished. “I even did an interview for Manchester Radio Online and Jason rang up and tried having a go. He made a comment saying that when I realise I’m not good enough and I give up, he’s going to buy my jokes off me and I was like alright, okay,” he smiles. “At least my jokes are good enough that he’d want to buy them.”

Manchester Has Increased Volcanicity!

VOLCANIC: Icelandic volcano spews ash all over Europe

BATHED in sun in one of Eastern Europe’s finest cities, in an upbeat beer garden in mid-Easter, the last thing you expect to hear is that a volcano has erupted and closed down airspace all over the continent and more importantly for me, Manchester. But the massive ash cloud that engulfed most of Europe’s airspace has had far reaching after affects on the home of Eccles cakes and Oasis. Jonathan Brown reports...

Possibly the most depressing site I have ever witnessed in my life was the departure boards at Prague Airport. Hundreds of flights all not so subtly marked with massive red capital letters as “CANCELLED”. Thousands of dreary prospective passengers litter the terminals sat on their bags, looking as if they’re contemplating whether they might be able to get a pilots licence and fly home before budget airlines can seat them in squalor class stools on the next tin bird back home. Scenes that echoed across Europe.

GUTTED: Holiday makers stranded

News of volcanic proportions meant that me and my worse for wear friends had two options to get home, either at least an extended stay in the city with zero money or a four country trek back home in complete discomfort. Choosing the latter on a somewhat ill-advised whim, the gruelling £350 journey home began with a monstrous ten hour minibus ride to Paris in a cramped people carrier with six unwashed men and a Czech native driver, Chavros, who spoke little to no English.

But I was one of millions of travellers stranded across the continent with limited means with which to get home and in Manchester around 300,000 people due to fly in or out of the airport were stuck. The unprecedented closures have meant that people have had to resort to everything but horseback to get to their destination and for us, Chavros was only the first leg of a torturous, hunger ridden marathon. Being part of that statistic isn’t all fun and games I hasten to add but some Mancunians had to travel from as far as India by land to get back to the northern Mecca that is Manchester.

In fact of the 120,000 Brits who have been stranded abroad since the closures, some are still struggling to get home weeks after the airports were re-opened as for many who holidayed outside of Europe flight cancellations have sent them right to the back of the cue.

Manchester was also a scene of panic as travellers scrambled together plans to get home, meaning we weren’t the only ones reverting to the roads. Taxi services across the region got calls for huge cross country fares such as the Lynx taxi firm in Stockport who bagged a £3,600 fare for taking 21 Americans to Madrid on a 1,200 mile journey south. Amber Cars and Radio Cars Manchester have also taken punters as far as Dover and Hull for ferry crossings costing hundreds of pounds a piece.

Despite this it hasn’t been all good news for Mancunian cab drivers. For many, the everyday fares that they might get to and from the airport have fallen foul of the volcano, leaving hundreds of drivers sat at home watching slow motion replays of eruptions and listening to newsreaders attempting to pronounce Eyjafjallajokull on the local news.

It has to be said though, Czech cab driver Chavros didn’t look like complaining as he gleefully counted the 1,000 Euros that we reluctantly paid him for our 650 mile journey to Paris. After a short four day break you cant help but curse your luck when on the second to last day all flights across Europe are grounded because of a volcano.

Despite our evident self pity and the fact that Chavros was starting to look like a somewhat broken man the more energy drinks he downed, the poor guy tried his very best to keep us in relatively high spirits at least. He attempted to cheer us up by talking to us about random Czech footballers and Manchester United in broken English but realistically the best near conversational offering I could return was a Haribo sweet which he duly gobbled up. Little did any of us know, however, that local sport back home was going to be affected in such a dramatic way.

Coincidentally during this first weekend of blanket closures the biggest game on the north-west’s footballing calendar was set to take place, the huge local derby between Manchester United and Manchester City. This clash of the titans was certainly a must see for any seven of your average Manchester based travelling students, stranded hundreds of miles away from home and we were no exception. But even something as localised as 22 mainly foreign, overpaid footballers playing for two local teams was interrupted somewhat by Thor’s volcano.

The scheduled referee for the game, Steve Bennett, happened to be another of the thousands stranded abroad, this time in Romania as he attended a refereeing course in the days prior to the momentous match. The game still went ahead after a last minute reshuffle but this was nothing compared to the lengths some of the area’s sports had to go to make sure their games went ahead.

Salford City Reds rugby team endured a torrid case of bad timing as they had a hugely important Challenge Cup fixture away in the south of France scheduled for that weekend against Catalan Dragons. With the sport’s governing body keen for the fixture to go ahead, Salford found themselves with little option but to make the arduous drive south to Perpignan or face some unhappy executives. Club spokesman, Paul McNally, helped to organise the trip and feels that some used the passion for their local team to make the trip against the odds, “It hit the fans quite hard because a few had booked flights, but some of the hardcore still managed to drive down which is beyond the call of duty really,” he said.

The teams journey was a mammoth one as they battled to keep the players from getting muscle cramps, “It took 37 hours of coach travel to get there and around five and a half days for the round trip instead of the normal hour flight each way,” Paul explained. “They stopped frequently every two hours or so to stretch and for breaks and they stopped in a couple of hotels along the way.”

It really isn’t hard to imagine how much discomfort the players must have been in, as they average 6 foot-plus in height and each weigh about the same as a pet elephant, but they had to make do. Paul added: “They even did rotas as to who could sleep in the isles to get a kip.”

Overall however there are some positives to be taken from the whole experience as the players became more of a unit through the almost week long trek to Perpignan and back. “Talking to the lads it wasn’t all bad, it was a good laugh in periods and there was a lot of team bonding going on,” he continues. “I mean they work together every day but they don’t live with each other and that’s what they had to do.”

So in some ways I can sympathise with the Salford players in that it is terribly uncomfortable in a cramped bus for such a long time despite the fact that their coach was full of luxuries but then again I’m sure they didn’t receive as cold reception as we did in Paris. Ice cold in fact. As when I arrived in Paris, the world’s most romantic city, it wasn’t as breath taking as I’d imagined partly due to me being freezing cold and accompanied by a plethora of similarly sweat ridden, grumpy lads with nowhere to go at 4am. However after giving up on sleep that night our journey took us, like many other Britons, to Galliene train and coach station where we were met with yet more knackered tourists. Dragging our carcasses off the train we spotted the line of travellers queued in hope, as one after the other they got to the front and shouted forcefully at the miniscule lady behind the coach station’s customer service desk. It wasn’t looking good. However through a well over due stroke of luck all seven of us managed to secure golden tickets to London via a ferry and a tiny in comparison six hour coach journey.

Thousands of Brits abroad also tried their hand at catching coaches home to Manchester, as we did. In fact 23 children and parents from St Catherine’s RC Primary School negotiated a 1,500 mile road trip through France back to Didsbury after having been stranded by that pesky volcano. The group of youngsters hopped on the ferry and thankfully got home in one piece as locals rallied to get back to the wind swept climbs of not so sunny Manchester from all over Europe.

SAVIOUR: Chorlton youngsters rescued by navy

Other school children also took to the seas somewhat more spectacularly in search of home. A group of pupils and parents from St John’s Primary School in Chorlton, who were on an exchange trip, became stranded in Porto as a result of the thickening ash crisis. Eight children and their parents had to get a 300 mile taxi ride to Santander on the coast of Spain where they were met by a British Navy warship, the HMS Albion. The immense ship was also carrying 500 British troops returning from Afghanistan, which to be fair sounds a lot more fun than my sweaty crawl back to Manchester.

So thankfully with supportive schools the spirit of Manchester helped to bring home the areas youngsters but others weren’t so lucky, causing absences that threatened school closures as teachers and pupils struggled to return home. Councillor John Warmisham, Salford’s lead member for children’s services has worked immensely hard to keep local schools running smoothly as hundreds of Greater Manchester’s teachers became marooned abroad. He explained: “I think one of our secondary schools actually had 10 teachers missing which is obviously a large number but all credit to them, they actually managed to find cover and keep the school open.

“We’ve been lucky that the old British bulldog spirit has meant that a lot of the curriculum areas have been covered as all the members of staff missed free periods and helped out classes in rotation to prepare pupils for the busy exam period.”

So clearly the spirit and togetherness of school workers to cover classes is a great example of how Greater Manchester has shown its community traits. Cllr Warmisham is also confident that because of the way local teachers have acted, the crisis won’t get the better of exam results, “The staff are really geared up to help our young people achieve the best and I think we’ll make sure that for any work that has been missed, they’ll be able to catch up,” he said.

Having finally touched down in blighty the TV news channels erupted with more and more stories of anguish, as families across Greater Manchester and beyond missed weddings and funerals. In fact some local schools were also caught up in the crisis by being run via telephone or email as head teachers were stuck abroad but the area was in anything but meltdown.

And after a short train journey from London, me and my travelling friends became some of the many holiday makers filtering back into Manchester’s Oxford Street Station that Sunday afternoon. The sun wasn’t shining, the clouds were heavy and the rain was threatening a typical northern welcome home party, all that was needed now was some chips and gravy. Manchester has never looked so good.

The eventual six day closure of Manchester airport culminated in it losing £4.2 million in revenue as hundreds of thousands of people scheduled to go through the airport were well and truly stuck with nowhere to go. Salford City Red’s players endured a five and a half day round trip to Perpignan at a heavy financial cost. Greater Manchester’s schools were short on staff and pupils and local industry such as taxi firms and travel companies lost money but essentially nothing stopped. Schools stayed open, sportsmen made their games and people got home. Manchester has suffered both economically and educationally to some degree yet it has come through a difficult time with flying colours.

The communal spirit of Greater Manchester has brought the area through this rough patch as people from all walks of life have battled the odds to beat the Icelandic volcano that has brought most of Europe to a stand still. We have a lot to be proud of and thankful for in Manchester and after all it could have been worse, it’s not like a volcano went off... oh wait.

Album Review: Sonic Youth- 'The Eternal'

PIONEERS: New album signals new strength for alternative veterans

WAILING feedback and smatterings of screeching guitar solos made alternative pioneers Sonic Youth what they are today, but their sixteenth studio album aptly named 'The Eternal', signals a change in direction. The New York based quintet have embarked on their most accessible record yet after signing with independent label Matador Records.

But this is by no means a pipe and slippers album, despite being a band deep into its second decade of recording. Instead 'The Eternal' delivers mesmerising guitar riffs that overlap like cloud-cover. They glide effortlessly from intimidating anthems to soft melodies and back again, enough to make fans of all ages want to sit back in amazement.

After influencing bands like Nirvana in the early nineties, Sonic Youth hint back at their experimental past on the albums opener. ‘Sacred Trickster’ is a two minute throwback to grungy times gone by with Kim Gordon’s distinctive vocals sounding like Katie White from the Ting Tings in a mosh pit. Clearly this is no tame pre-retirement payday however as they shout “Anti-war is anti-orgasm!” in a later song. But it isn’t a head-banger, it’s a refined collection combining ever-changing guitar chords, sprinkles of Muse-esque feedback and spades of blissful vocals.

Gordon’s breathy, intimate voice is brought to the fore in the enchanting ‘Massage History’, a nine minute dream-like swansong masked with endless layers of key changes. The Eternal’s finest moment however is another cauldron of sound where Gordon again reigns supreme. ‘Malibu Gas Station’ is haunting and hypnotic with trademark vocals like “My mind is hazy, just a little crazy”, whilst intricate guitar chords from Lee Ranaldo run the show.

Sonic Youth have hit a high note with this one. But The Eternal is not a commercial record like its predecessor Rather Ripped nor is it experimental like 1983s Confusion is Sex, instead it’s the best possible compromise.

8/10